I got in to work this morning, for the last day of my penultimate week working for my organisation, only to find that my desk and surrounding area had been overtaken by oranges, not even orange oranges, but yellow skinned oranges, must be because we’re in Asia, ha. This is not the first time this has happened to me lately, but i think it could be a sign that i am close to accomplishing my task of sustainably revolutionising the way we work so that even oranges could do what i do, or perhaps that i am in need of vitamin c, or maybe they just want me to leave, any other suggestions?

In a previous organisation I was replaced by a human sized inflatable penguin. Apparently it sat at my old desk for several months with my name tag on it, and no one noticed, except to comment that i had looked decidedly more handsome in my new suit and was much better with children rubbing my belly.